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FranklinCovey Co-Founders Collection
Dr. JJ's Personal Library |
Book the Third
The Self-Action Leadership Philosophy
Dedicated to...
Dr. Stephen R. Covey and M. Scott Peck, M.D.
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M. Scott Peck, M.D. Collection
Dr. JJ's Personal Library |
More than any other single authors, Doctors Covey and Peck taught and then reinforced for me the importance, value, and honor of taking complete
personal responsibility for everything in my life that I can either control or influence
. I will forever be grateful to them for
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People and
The Road Less Traveled and enthusiastically commend them to YOU, the reader, as two of the most important and influential books in the creation of this comprehensive Life Leadership textbook.
"In the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves. The process never ends ... And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility."
—Eleonor Roosevelt
Chapter 1
What is the SAL Philosophy?
The SAL philosophy can be summed up in two simple words:
Personal Responsibility
There is, of course, more to it that just that, but the philosophical essence of SAL really is that basic. It involves: principles, practices, and premises that promote taking complete personal responsibility for everything in your life that you can either control or influence.
SELF-ACTION LEADERSHIP PHILOSOPHY
Principles, practices, and premises that promote taking complete personal responsibility for everything in your life that you can either control or influence.
Postmodern Cultures of Complacency and Blame
Taking personal responsibility involves eschewing cultures of complacency and blame, which have grown rife amidst postmodern philosophies that promote hedonism, narcissism, and nihilism over self-restraint, service, and sacrifice. Indeed, we live in a world where far too many individuals blame other people and things for the results that they do, or do not, get in their lives. Instead of spending their time and energy searching after authentic solutions to their problems, the goal of these "blame-gamers" is to find a scapegoat for their failures and then throw a perpetual pity party for themselves—and whoever is willing to join them.
Blame-gamers believe that their problems are everyone and everything else's fault, but never a result of their own bad decisions or irresponsible behavior. A blame-gamers troubles are never his or own fault; they are always the fault of one's ancestry, parents, siblings, extended family members, friends, coworkers, organization, boss, community, state, nation, world, government, history, God, DNA—or even one's "stars." As Henry David Thoreau—a pal of Emerson's—once remarked: As long as a man stands in his own way, everything seems to be in his way, governments, society, and even the sun and moon and stars, as astrology may testify."
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Henry David Thoreau
1817-1862 |
"Henry Thoreau made, last night, the fine remark that, as long as a [person] stands in his [or her] own way, everything seems to be in the way, governments, society, and even the sun and moon and stars,as astrology may testify."
—Ralph Waldo Emerson
(Quoting Thoreau in his Journal)
Please do not misunderstand.
I am not saying that external forces and internal variables do not play a role, and sometimes a significant role, in the circumstances and events of our lives; of course they do! This point will be thoroughly detailed and otherwise explicated in Chapter 7 of BOOK the THIRD, where 17 specific variables are identified and addressed.
There is no question that bad things do happen to good people beyond their control. However, human beings always possess the liberty to choose what they are going to think about, say, and do NEXT. And since YOU and I are both human beings, I am talking about us.
Therein lies the essence and power of Self Action Leadership!
It has been said that you can't always control how you feel, but you can control what you think about, say, and do about how you feel; and therein lies the power to regulate and modulate your emotional state over time. Regardless how YOU or I may feel at any given moment in time, we are always free to respond to what happens to us. This is just one of many things that existentially elevates us above the rest of the animal kingdom.
Therein lies the essence and power of Emotional Intelligence, which is a crucial element of SAL!
SAL Mantra
You can't always control how you feel.
But you can control what you think about, say, and do about how you feel.
As human beings, YOU and I possess the liberty and power to proactively choose how we will respond to people, things, circumstances, and events in our lives. Unlike animals, we are not destined to react in predetermined, Pavlovian, and mercurial fashion to the exigencies, crises, and trials of life. YOU and I are always at liberty to decide how we will respond to any and every situation and circumstance in our lives and careers. The more effectively we exercise that liberty, the more our external circumstances will improve over time.
One of my favorite high-profile examples of personal responsibility in action over time is Oprah Winfrey, a mega-media mogul from the United States. Oprah is the first African American woman to become a billionaire. Yes, that's billionarie with a "B." Oprah has directly blessed and/or influenced hundreds of millions (if not billions) of people as an actress, talk show host, and philanthropist. Most, if not all, educated adults the world round know who Oprah Winfrey is and what she has accomplished. She is one of the most famous, powerful, and remarkable women who has ever graced planet Earth.
What some do not know about Oprah is that she was born into poverty in one of the poorest states in America in the 1950s, when prejudice and segregation against Blacks was still institutionalized and deeply imbedded in American culture. And her troubles didn't end there. Oprah's childhood and adolescence was marked by a variety of crucibles, including sexual abuse.
Oprah's thorny start in life did not portend the kind of beauty, grace, and greatness she would eventually achieve. Nevertheless, give a determined self action leader like Oprah a few decades of time and the liberty to direct her own thoughts, speech, and actions, and she'll rise up and change the world. Along the way, she found a way to transcend anything that life tried to throw at her. Instead of giving in to social pressures around her and becoming a victim of circumstance, Oprah chose to change, grow, and become increasingly free until she not only made her mark on the world, but has in fact helped to change the world in positive, meaningful, and lasting ways in the process.
Oprah's inspiring story reminds me of the words of Napoleon Hill, the famous author of the best-selling book: Think and Grow Rich. Said Hill: Before success comes in any man's life, he is sure to meet with much temporary defeat, and perhaps some failure. ... Remember that all who succeed in life get off to a bad start, and pass through many heartbreaking struggles before they "arrive." (1)
"Before success comes in any[one's] life, [one] is sure to meet with much temporary defeat, and perhaps some failure. ... Remember that all who succeed in life get off to a bad start, and pass through many heartbreaking struggles before they 'arrive.'"
My own journey to success was very different from Oprah's, but one component of our respective journeys was very similar: we both met with much temporary defeat, failure, and passed through many heartbreaking struggles before we arrived—just as Napoleon Hill said we would. And so it will be with YOU or anyone else who succeeds in any significant way.
There simply are no shortcuts to authentic change, growth, happiness, success, fulfilment, or inner peace.
Everyone must pay the price these desirable states demand!
Oprah's life is a remarkable demonstration of the power of consistently exercising personal responsibility over long periods of time. If YOU are willing to make the same kind of commitment to your own growth and freedom, it doesn't matter who you are, you will eventually earn the same kind of growth as Oprah. This fact does not mean, of course, that everyone who makes such an effort is guaranteed to become a billionaire talk show host.
But that's okay!
Why is it okay?
Because the focus of Self-Action Leadership is not aimed at inter-personal competition against rivals; the focus of SAL is on intra-personal growth, freedom, achievement, fulfillment, and inner peace. We are all different beings with a unique toolbox of gifts, talents, abilities, and desires. As such, the very best SAL efforts of one person may result in a very different life picture than the very best SAL efforts of another person. In the end, however, both pictures have the potential of being equally and exquisitely—albeit ultimately incomparably—beautiful.
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Theodore Roosevelt
1858-1919 |
Self action leaders understand the long-term futility in comparing themselves with others. They recognize the wisdom of Theodore Roosevelt, who once quipped that:
Comparison is the thief of joy.
"Comparison is the thief of joy."
Avoid stealing your own happiness, peace, and contentment by continually conditioning such priceless states on comparisons with others. Instead, invite these wonderful things into your life in increasing measures by simply being the best YOU that you are capable of—and conditioning your joy on that and that alone.
It won't always be easy to accomplish this skill; after all, it is human nature to compare ourselves with others. But if you are serious about SAL, it is a skill you will keep practicing until you have mastered it.
Along the often arduous, circuitous, lengthy, and steep pathways of your own existential journey towards growth and freedom, YOU—like Oprah—must remain determined, consistent, persistent, and patient. In the words of Napoleon Hill, "when defeat overtakes a [person], the easiest and most logical thing to do is to quit, [and] that is exactly what the majority of [people] do." (2)
Some (and perhaps many) people will try to convince you that Oprah Winfrey (and others like her) is an outlier and that "cherry-picking" her as an example of success to hold up to inspire others is unfair and unrealistic. And you know what? If you believe this is true, it will be true for you and you will never rise to the full stature of your potential. But if you believe that you can succeed in significant ways in life—like Oprah—and are willing to pay the price that significant success demands, then the sky really is the limit. In the end, the greatest constraints and limitations you will face in life are the ones you choose to place upon YOURSELF in conjunction with the restrictions you allow others to place upon you.
Don't allow yourself to be so limited and constrained!
Declare your INDEPENDENCE from mediocre minds and related voices in your own head.
If you are blessed with the opportunity to learn about Self-Action Leadership and possess the ability and health to implement its practices, yet still find yourself mired in the same—or worse—circumstances at the end of your life as you were at the beginning of your life, you really have no one to blame but yourself. In the words of Dr. Stephen R. Covey: We are responsible for our own effectiveness, our own happiness, and ultimately, I would say, for most of our circumstances. (3)
"We are responsible for our own effectiveness, our own happiness,
and ultimately, I would say, for most of our circumstances."
You will notice in the above quote that Covey says "most" of our circumstances. Not all; but most. It is quite true that you can't change where you started out in life. You also cannot prevent all bad things from happening to you against your desires and will. Life often isn't fair—especially in the short run; that's just the way things are! There is nothing you can do to change your ancestry, birth, early years, or other past experiences and choices. But there is much you can do to shape your present and future decisions and thereby dramatically influence a more positive and productive long-term trajectory for your life and career.
Generally speaking, you have TWO (2) primary choices after YOU are born into this world. The first option is to complain about your lot in life and blame others for your misfortunes. The second option is to take advantage of every opportunity and resource you have access to in an effort to learn and grow as much as you can with what you have. You can either view your life and career as fixed and unalterable realities, or you can do the best you can with what you have and watch it gradually evolve into a brighter future.
The choice really is YOURS!
I eagerly encourage you to take the latter route, even—and especially—if you have been unjustly treated by individuals, groups, or culture and society-at-large in the past. While some people (or peoples) legitimately have had, do have, and will yet have a harder "row to hoe" than others, all of us have received the proverbial "short end of the stick" in one way or another. Constantly comparing ourselves with others is counterproductive to realizing your full potential; and as Theodore Roosevelt so incisively reminds us, it robs you of joy as well!
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"REPUBLIC DAY," which Gandhi
helped make possible, is celebrated
by Indians on January 26th. |
No matter where you came from or what you did (or didn't) have when you started off in life, we ALL have opportunities to exercise proactive Self-Action Leadership in the face of difficulties, injustice, and unfairness. Oprah didn't transcend poverty and abuse by merely cursing her abusers and condemning injustices in American society. Similarly, Gandhi did not secure freedom for the Indian people by condemning the English Royal Court, the British Raj, or the British Empire-at-large. Martin Luther King, Jr. and his colleagues didn't succeed in garnering civil rights for African Americans by simply trumpeting the grievances of racism, discrimination, disenfranchisement, and slavery.
While all three of these great leaders could have easily felt justified in complaining about how hard they and their people had it, they were honest and humble enough to
accept, and smart enough to
realize, that just complaining would not lead to a better life for them or their people. These inspiring leaders understood that the pathway to a better life always lies in education, personal growth and development, and the cultivation of valuable skills and talents—in other words, in Self-Action Leadership—especially in the face of indignity, injustice, unfairness, and slander. They understood that freedom is not found in criticizing, condemning, and complaining; it comes from
doing,
creating, and
contributing. In the words of Vince Lombardi—that famous Green Bay Packers championship football coach:
The measure of who we are is what we do with what we have.
"The measure of who we are is what we do with what we have."
Oprah, Gandhi, and MLK all chose a higher path—The Road Less Traveled—whereby they opted to "never breathe a word about their loss[es]," (4) while concurrently working extremely hard, avoiding excuse-making, and determining to never, ever, ever give up. The result was that these three individuals—and others like them—changed the world in positive ways that left indelible impacts on society that our generation, and generations yet to come, will forever admire and learn from.
"Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the road less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference." (5)
I have tremendous admiration and respect for the exemplary courage, remarkable leadership, and considerable achievements of these extraordinary individuals and all those who have trodden a similar pathway through life. I encourage you to study their lives in order to learn from and be inspired by their incredible examples.
Sadly, in today's postmodern world, many so-called leaders of various causes disregard the examples of Gandhi, MLK, and Oprah. These so-called leaders have proliferated a cultural vat of victimization to the point of establishing entirely new academic fields and industries whose life-blood feeds on the recycled rhetoric of past grievances, the unjust exaggeration, manipulation, and exploitation of outlying incidents in the present, and fatuously frenetic fearmongering for the future.
The Greatest Opportunity in the World
A great religious leader once taught that next to life itself, the greatest blessing and opportunity that each of us possesses is the freedom to direct that life. (6) There is no more important information than the knowledge that empowers you to effectively lead your own life and then positively influence others to effectively lead theirs. It is wonderful beyond measure to possess such liberty and potential.
But, as is always the case, preserving communal liberty and earning individual freedom always comes with a price that must be paid for in time, effort, and sacrifice. Whether you know it or not and whether you like it or not, natural consequences always flow from every thought, word, and deed you ever think about, say, and do. Regardless where or how you start out in life, or what happens to you along the way beyond your immediate control, you remain sovereign over your individual choices (responses).
This means that...
Nothing goes until you go;
Nothing works until you work;
Nothing happens until you start happening!
I invite you to go to work TODAY by standing firm in your commitment to read and carefully study the rest of this Life Leadership textbook, complete the SAL Master Challenge, and then continue to personify its principles by animating its practices for the rest of your life. If you will do these things, your life will start to happen in ways you had never before believed, or had only dreamed of in the past.
SAL Mantra
Nothing goes until YOU go.
Nothing works until YOU work;
Nothing happens until YOU happen!
In Your Journal
- What can you do beginning TODAY to more fully take personal responsibility for the direction of:
- Your life?
- Your career?
- Your relationships?
- Your long-term legacy as a human being?
—Dr. JJ
Wednesday, April 3, 2024
Palm Beach Gardens, Florida, USA
Author's Note: This is the 382nd Blog Post Published by Freedom Focused LLC since November 2013 and the 193rd consecutive weekly blog published since August 31, 2020.
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Chapter 1 Notes:
1. Hill, N. (1960). Think & Grow Rich. New York, NY: Fawcett Crest. Pages 23
and 39.
2. Hill, N. (1960). Think & Grow Rich. New York, NY: Fawcett Crest. Page 23.
3. Covey, S. R. (1989). The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons
in Personal Change. New York, NY: Fireside. Page 93.
4. Paraphrased line from Rudyard Kipling’s poem, If (stanza 3, line 4).
5. Concluding lines from Frost's famous poem, The Road Not Taken.
6. McKay, D.O. (1950). Free Agency... A Divine Gift. — “Next to the bestowal of life itself, the right to direct that life is God’s greatest gift
to man.”
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