Chapter 5
A New and Fresh Concept of Competition
Self-action leaders recognize that in the long-run, a healthy work and life balance that produces happiness and inner peace is more important than being a CEO, famous artist, pro athlete, or mingling financially among the one-percenters. There is, of course, nothing inherently wrong with achieving such things. Indeed, they are all noteworthy accomplishments that others can potentially admire, look up to, and respect.
The good news about SAL is that it doesn't matter how famous (or not), or rich (or not) you were, are, or may yet become. The only thing that really matters is whether or not you are headed in the right direction morally, ethically, and existentially speaking—and whether or not you are enjoying your journey along the way.
There are, of course, examples of outlying worldly achievers who are also unusually well balanced in their personal lives, careers, and relationships. But high-profile or otherwise highly successful persons who attain that balance did not achieve such equilibrium because they possess outlying talent; they did so by following the same Self-Action Leadership principles and practices that anyone else who achieved Existential Balance has to follow. Thus SAL—and its role in pursuing Existential Balance, Growth, and Intelligence—becomes a great equalizer within and among the human race.
What a truly magnificent TRUTH!
The Myth of Fair Interpersonal Competition
Despite our many obvious similarities as members of the human race, all people are profoundly unique. Indeed, every single soul that has ever inhabited this planet—including identical or even co-joined twins—remain remarkably original; no two of us are exactly the same. This is true of our singular genetic makeup as well as our individual personality, preferences, strengths, weaknesses, hopes, dreams, goals, vision, etc.
To illustrate this point, take a few seconds to watch a YouTube clip of Jamaican sprinting superstar Usain Bolt when he set the world record in the 100-meter dash at the 2009 World Championships in Berlin, Germany. In this completely unprecedented race, Bolt left the rest of the world-class field in the dust to clock a previously inconceivable 9.58 seconds!
Before Bolt came on the sprinting scene in the early-mid 2000s, no one had ever run faster than 9.74 seconds. When I was growing up in the 1980s and 90s, the only people who had ever run under 9.80 had their times disqualified for either doping or the presence of an illegal tailwind. Running faster than 9.70 seemed unlikely; but running under 9.60 seemed like the stuff of fantasy or science fiction.
But then, at the 2008 Olympics in Beijing, China, Bolt did the impossible; he bested the 9.7 mark by clocking a 9.68 to win the gold medal and break his own previous world record mark of 9.71. As impressive as this blazing time was, it was more than a tenth-of-a-second slower than Bolt would sprint one year later in Berlin.
When you look at Bolt's remarkable physique—the seemingly perfect formulaic blend of height, weight, and strength for speed—even an amateur onlooker can grasp why Bolt consistently performed head-and-shoulders ahead of his elite competitors.
In real life, it is not unheard of for the last place finisher in any given "race" to actually expend the greatest personal effort. Losing a competition against others—even at the elite level—may have little (or perhaps nothing) to do with the quality of your own preparation and effort. In most cases, it is merely a matter of different life variables at-play; and a better endowed package of variables will usually come out on top of the lesser endowed person.
There are, of course, endless exceptions to this general scenario, which is, in part, the beauty and glory of SAL. In other words, there are indeed cases when individuals or teams produce greater results because they invest greater intention, preparation, effort, dedication, consistence, persistence, determination, et cetera, than competitors who possessed a more well-endowed package of life variables.
In other cases, however, one person's best can easily be bested by someone else's best, or even one's less-than-best. In the final analysis, the ultimate result of any interpersonal competition will be determined with at least quasi-mathematical precision according to the unique output of each person's individual effort multiplied by one's unique set of life variables.
Understanding this great truism can help us to keep our own performances and results—and that of others—in perspective. It can also aid us in feeling better about our own accomplishments—and that of others.
My Personal Quest to Become an Elite Interpersonal Performer
Since age seven or eight, I have had a deep and pulsating desire to be an elite performer—if not the very best in the world—at something. It was around this same age and stage of my life that I became fascinated by time management, personal planning, and other self-leadership oriented subjects. Much of my early interest in these topics stemmed from my desire to become not just my best, but the best at something.
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| A 9-year old "Air Jordan" Mesa, Arizona Circa 1988 |
Unfortunately—or fortunately (depending on how you look at it)—Kobe Bryant, Tim Duncan, Allen Iverson, and other NBA players my age beat me to the punch. I not only failed in my objective to become an NBA star, but I lost interest in the game altogether after my ninth grade year in high school!
It's amazing how our desires and motivations can evolve and change over time.
My early exit from the game of basketball surprised me. It also surprised family members, friends, and coaches who knew of my talent in and passion for the sport.
Nevertheless, in the end, I not only lacked the physicality and talent to become an elite basketball player, but my compatibility, desire, and vision was gradually extinguished as well.
In the end, and for a variety of reasons, basketball and JJ were simply not a good fit. Although the sun had set on my basketball career, it did not extinguish my desire to become a world-class performer at something.
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| JJ leads a collegiate 800 meter race Weber State University; Ogden, Utah; 2003 |
It was many years after college before I fully recognized and accepted this reality. In other words, for a long time after I had officially retired from competitive racing, I continued to believe deep-down that I could potentially become an elite middle-distance runner if I were to make the proper investment of time, effort, discipline, and dedication.
The truth of the matter was that this was wishful thinking on my part. In fact, as I reflect back on these musings years later, my mind and heart swells with mixed emotions. On the one hand, I am proud of the fact that I was never afraid to think big and shoot for the stars. On the other hand, I feel a little embarrassed at my inability to reconcile my actual ability with stark reality. After all, a complete commitment to reality lies at the very heart of both mental health and Self-Action Leadership.
After the end of my relatively short career in athletics, I pursued other activities with an initial aim towards elite performance, only to discover that I lacked sufficient desire, passion, and natural proclivity for said fields.
Case-in-point: SALES.
My life has, in many ways, been one, long, bad date with the art and science of customer sales. It began with a deep dislike—even an ardent aversion—to those pesky door-to-door fundraisers in elementary school and Cub Scouts. Ironically, these distasteful experiences did not quell my pursuit of sales-oriented professional pursuits.
Not even close!
As I grew older, I learned that many of the world's most successful people (at least financially speaking) were salespeople of one kind or another. With this-in-mind, I often felt duty-bound to face my fears of and aversion to sales by "doing it anyway" in hopes I would eventually learn to like it and then break through to some kind of monumental success in the process.
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| A modest achievement as a network marketing salesman |
Along the way I lasted for a few months as a part-time network marketing representative, a few weeks as a direct-sales peddler of cutlery, and a single day as a small-business telephone services salesman. In all, I earned less than a thousand dollars for my combined efforts across all three endeavors.
As any salesperson worth his or her salt is apt to say: "But wait... there is more... much, much, MUCH more!"
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| My Missionary Plaque, which hung on the walls of my local church building during my service from 1999-2001 |
Then I came home, graduated from college, and founded Freedom Focused where I spent two decades trying to sell books and seminars—with paltry results, to say the least. Interspersed into that 20-year period I spent eight years as an independent contact trainer where part of my job included "back-of-the-room" product sales. As I traveled all over the English-speaking language teaching seminars, and despite outstanding seminar attendee evaluations, my sales numbers consistently ranked among the lower-tier of trainers.
Suffice it to say, I have had to discover time-after-time over a period of several decades that I am simply not well-suited to sales. Realizing this over-and-over-and-over again has proved to be a perpetually painful predicament.
BUT in the end, it has also proved to be enormously LIBERATING!
One of the biggest challenges I faced throughout this journey was managing the voices in my head of past sales trainers (I've attended a lot of sales training over the years) who would suggest that sales is more about attitude and training than it is about inclination and personality. To an extent, these trainers always had a point—after all, education and attitude is a key component to success in anything, regardless of your native disposition and personal proclivities.
But an even more primal truth also exists, and that truth is that we all inevitably flower and flourish more fully in an activity or field we love and are passionate about than one in which we inherently loathe. It's a pretty simple concept.
As I have journeyed along the circuitous corridors and painful pathways of my 36-years long "bad marriage" with SALES, I have learned that it is time for a divorce! While I am typically not a proponent of divorce in marriage (literally or figuratively), I am pragmatic and sensible enough to know when "enough-is-enough," and am discovering that it is very FREEING to disembark from—and then giddily burn—a ship I am not meant to sail on forever.
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| The sun has formally set on my "Ship of Sales." Now it's time to "Burn the Ships" and "Don't Look Back!" |
There is no question these dues had to be paid as part of a primal price and requisite responsibility to prove worthy of the place and position I ultimately intended to occupy. But it was more akin to "Boot Camp" than "Officer's Candidate School."
Boot camp is a "necessary evil" of any soldier's training.
But if you want to be a General; OCS is a lot more fun!
In other words, an equally (if not more) important ingredient to my long-term success was found in my relentless pursuit of what I truly loved doing, which was writing, organizing, speaking, training, influencing, and leading.
Chief among all these activities—all of which I have a natural flair and talent for—has been WRITING.
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| My first Journal Entry Mesa, Arizona, USA Thursday, January 1, 1987 |
The result of these efforts and endeavors have been prolific, to say the least, including:
- Thousands of pages in personal journals
- Thousands of pages of personal and business letters, emails, and texts
- Thousands of pages of school work over 19 years of formal education
- 1,149 pages of my doctoral dissertation
- Thousands of published pages in eight (8) books
- Thousands of published pages in 500 blog articles
- Hundreds of published pages in newspapers, academic journals, and other publications
It was painful for me to repeatedly recognize the reality that I will never be elite at activities such as: basketball, running, or sales. But along the way, I discovered there are some things at which I can be an elite professional—if not the very best at.
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| Dr. JJ's 4-Volume 1,149 page Doctoral dissertation |
As I sit in my office typing these words, the world still does not know about SAL—and quite frankly, my tireless efforts to try and promote it to the world has been an almost comical (temporary) failure to date.
But that is okay—and for three very important reasons.
First, I've done the very best I knew how to create and then share this message with the world. And in the last analysis, I cannot force others to pay attention to and accept my message; I can only write and invite.
Second, I've found my unique niche and voice in my life and career; and I absolutely LOVE what I do! As such, I find enjoyment, fulfillment, and success in my work regardless of the way in which it is (or is not) embraced by others.
Third, others have embraced it... just not in significant numbers. But in the last analysis, if I managed to help only a few people—or even just ONE—an argument could be made that it was worth it because it helped somebody, somwhere, at some point, with something—and that's one of the goals of the work!
While I continue to believe... and desire... and hope... and pray that this comprehensive work will, in its time, be widely embraced by others, it has been so satisfying to have finally arrived at the place where I am okay if it doesn't because of the endless other beauties and bounties with which I have been blessed all along the way!
Truly, the greatest JOY of all is in the JOURNEY...
And what a journey it has been!
How grateful I am to have discovered that the greatest quest I can undertake is not to try and beat others in an interpersonal competition, but to simply become my own best self in an intrapersonal competition. There is little time or energy left to compete against others when you are focusing all your time, attention, and power on being your own best self and producing your own greatest results.
In the process of doing so, you will inevitably surpass and fall short of the performances of others along the way. But either way (win or lose), you'll stop caring so much about where and how you stack up against and in competition with others because you will have developed the quiet confidence and inner peace that can only come from a knowledge that you did your best—and the truth of the matter is that YOU CAN'T DO ANY BETTER THAN THAT!
And in the end, that's all that really matters!
As simple as this may sound theoretically, the actual practice of this principle can be extremely tricky and difficult, and I say this from the unique vantage point of my own experience and failures over the course of nearly 40 years! Even as the author of this work and the proclaimer of this point, I confess I struggle every day of my life to compete solely with myself and avoid prideful and unnecessary comparisons with others.
It's human nature to compare ourselves to others!
But it's also possible to retrain our paradigms to embrace intrapersonal competition.
It should be noted here that there are times when it's both appropriate and helpful to make interpersonal comparisons and to compete with others. Doing so can assist and motivate you in your efforts to elevate your own performance and potential. However, if you allow yourself to become overly caught up in the interpersonal component of competition instead of focusing on the intrapersonal element, you're bound to lose focus on your own goals for personal improvement and growth. That loss of focus can then become compounded by negative emotions like anger, bitterness, and jealousy, all of which waste valuable energy—passion that could be productively channeled toward elevating and honing your own performance. The end result may be diminished returns on your own efforts at success, whether you are officially competing with others or not.
A Competition Paradigm Shift
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| The "Silver Star" that self-action leaders are pursuing is not primarily to beat others but to simply become their best selves. |
One of my expectations for this Life Leadership textbook is to influence a widespread paradigm shift among people and organizations alike with regards to competition. The goal of this mindset change is to stop placing preeminent value on being "The Best," and instead shift our focus toward continually becoming "Your Best" and "My Best" by striving towards and attaining Existential Balance, Growth, and Freedom.
Embracing this paradigm shift frees up a lot of time and effort that can, in turn, be invested in improving your own performance instead of continually fixating on how you stack up in competition with others. This mindset change toward intrapersonal competition has the added benefit of actually improving your chances for success when you must compete interpersonally with other people and organizations.
Most importantly, this paradigm shift will contribute to the production of positive feelings, such as happiness, satisfaction, contentment, fulfillment, and inner peace—which sure beats opposing emotions of angst, discontent, frustration, disappointment, discouragement, and jealousy.
Considering the current cultural climate in which we live, where elite performers and their performances are held up as royal monarchs of a postmodern King's Court, while the rest of us are viewed as average citizens or worse—plebeian nobodies—it's a tall order to make, to say the very least. Nevertheless, I believe it's possible for wide swaths of the global populace to make this mindset change over time. Rest assured that we at Freedom Focused will do everything we can to proclaim, promote, and support this quest.
I've spent much of my life trying to become the very best at something. That is not necessarily a bad thing. In fact, it might be argued that in some ways, I have succeeded! After all, it was—at least in part—my undeviating passion for excellence and achievement that empowered my relentless composition and revision of this text through SEVEN (7) different comprehensive draft iterations over the past 23 years. Moreover, as a lifelong athlete and sports enthusiast, I will be the first to admit that there are times and places when interpersonal competition is both appropriate and potentially beneficial and inspiring to everyone involved.
Thankfully, along the way I've discovered the GREAT TRUTH that simply striving to be my best can be as challenging a pursuit as trying to surpass the achievements of others—and sometimes even more so. Indeed, the opportunity that we each have to become our best selves provides a challenge sufficiently difficult, engaging, and exciting to keep us all busy until we eventually pass away from this world and, according to my beliefs, far beyond as well.
Just as the decathlon is the ultimate track & field event, life provides us with one of its ultimate existential opportunities in our ongoing pursuit of the SAL octathlon discussed in the previous chapter. And the good news—the gospel of SAL—is that you don't have to compete with anyone other than YOURSELF!
With this insight in mind, I hope you are looking forward to the rest of your mortal journey as much as I am looking forward to mine!
Generalists and Specialists
Our world is filled with a mixture of generalists and specialists.
GENERALISTS are people who perform work and other tasks that do not require extensive or specialized training and experience to perform. Examples of generalists include: assembly persons, assistants, clerical workers, cleaners and custodians, customer service representatives, delivery persons, drivers, manual laborers of all kinds, postal workers, receptionists, servers, temp workers, etc.
SPECIALISTS are people who perform work and other tasks that do require extensive or specialized training and experience to perform. Examples of specialists include: actors, architects, artists, attorneys, designers, dentists, doctors, electricians, engineers, executives, inventors, IT experts, musicians, plumbers, scientists, surgeons, teachers, technologists, etc.
There will always be a need in our world for both generalists and specialists. However, just as the percentage of leaders and top performers is minuscule compared to followers and "the rest of the pack," the number of generalists will always be higher than the number of specialists. As a result, generalists will usually receive less attention, credit, honor, glory, and financial remuneration for their efforts and contributions.
This does not, however, make them any less important to society.
It simply makes them less visible.
Quarterbacks will always be better compensated and achieve greater prominence than offensive linemen. However, it is no secret that every quarterback would be in deep trouble without his offensive line!
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| H.W. Longfellow 1807-1882 |
In light of this great truth, the sage words of Henry Wadsworth Longfellow bear repeating here:
"Nothing useless is, or low;
Each thing in its place is best;
And what seems but idle show
Strengthens and supports the rest." (2)
- In what ways do you currently compare yourself with others?
- Are these comparisons positive and helpful or negative and counterproductive?
- What benefits might you derive from shifting your own paradigm from primarily competing with others to primarily competing with yourself?
—Dr. JJ
Author's Note: This is the 386th Blog Post Published by Freedom Focused LLC since November 2013 and the 197th consecutive weekly blog published since August 31, 2020.
Click HERE for a compete listing of the other 385 FF Blog Articles
Click HERE for a complete listing of Freedom Focused SAL QUOTES
Click HERE for a complete listing of Freedom Focused SAL POEMS
Click HERE to access the FULL TEXT of Dr. JJ's Psalms of Life: A Poetry Collection
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Tune in NEXT Wednesday for another article on a Self-Action Leadership related topic.
Click HERE to buy the SAL Textbooks
Chapter 5 Notes:
1. Peck, M.S. (1993). Further Along the Road Less Traveled: The Unending Journey toward Spiritual Growth (The Edited Lectures). New York, NY: Simon and Schuster. Page 75. "Mental health [is] a process of ongoing dedication to reality at all costs ... no matter how uncomfortable the reality makes [you feel]."
2. Longfellow, H.W. (1912) The Poetical Works of Longfellow. Henry Frowde, Oxford University Press. Page 186. From the poem: The Builders.
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