Self-AWARENESS

  

 Chapter 7

Self-AWARENESS

Construction Stage 1.3   Acquiring and Allotting Financial Resources

SAL Model Stage 1.3   Self-Awareness

"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves."

—Carl Jung 

Acquiring self-awareness is a metaphorical analogue to acquiring the workers, materials, and most importantly—the cash (or credit)—required to build a skyscraper. 

The importance of this CASH (or credit) in construction—or anything else for that matter—should not be underestimated. In this world, you simply cannot assemble, construct, or pursue anything tangible without it. 

Likewise, earning Existential Growth and freedom are contingent upon acquiring extensive amounts of self-awareness over time. Just as you will not make any tangible construction progress without cash (or credit), you will not make any significant progress as a self-action leader without a keen awareness of self. 

This awareness includes a clear comprehension of your strengths and weaknesses, assets and liabilities, needs and desires, mission and vision, objectives and goals, and a host of other relevant variables involving yourself and the rest of the world as it relates to you. 

As Socrates so succinctly stated so long ago: Know Thyself.

"Know Thyself."

—Socrates 

This is not only a very short quote; it is also a very simple concept—in theory.

But in actual practice, it is one of the most difficult challenges and complicated opportunities available to us in this world. Many—and perhaps even most—people go to their graves still not really knowing themselves in terms of who they really are and what exactly makes them tick. And no one—no matter how capable, intelligent, or self-aware—can come to know oneself fully or perfectly in this life.

Truly knowing oneself is a tough, tricky, and time-consuming business! 

But it is possible; and for those who consistently and persistently pursue it, self-awareness can be an incredibly enriching journey. 

It certainly has been for me! 

Honest self-awareness is the only authentic antidote to self-deception. It is an absolutely indispensable ingredient in Existential Growth and freedom.

SAL revolves around self-awareness in both principle and practice. Self-awareness is obtained through a brutally honest and ongoing assessment of REALITY as it relates to YOU and other people and things. 

Self-awareness also involves recognizing, acknowledging, and then humbly accepting the existence and incontrovertibility of True Principles, Universal Laws, and other objective realities.

Self-awareness is achieved through self-observation, self-examination, and obtaining feedback from others (1). Let's address these three items in course.

Self-Observation

Self-observation involves noticing and then carefully observing your own thoughts, words, and actions to discover what you are doing, when you are doing it, and most importantly: why you are doing it. The goal of self-observation is to obtain the self-awareness necessary to effectively direct and manage your behavior, and when necessary, to alter or change it. (2)

Self-observation further empowers you to continually check and determine whether your thoughts, speech, behavior, attitudes, and beliefs are aligned with your personal and/or professional vision, mission, values, goals, standards of conduct, etc.

  

Self-Examination

Self-examination incorporates various goal-setting and other SAL strategies aimed at discovering your life's purpose. (3) Self-examination helps you obtain greater clarity about who you are and what your purpose in life is. It also involves discovering your authentic, original, and unique voice within a framework of your life's true calling. 

Specific methods of self-examination will be provided in a later chapter. 

Self-observation and self-examination should be ongoing pursuits of self-action leaders on all levels of Existential Growth.  

Feedback from Others

As stated earlier in this chapter, none of us is capable of perfect self-awareness in this life and world. Moreover, none of us is capable of obtaining the same degree and level of self-awareness on our own as we are with the aid of constructive feedback from others. 

Getting feedback from others is among the most important habits and skills a self-action leader can ever practice and develop. However, doing so is not always easy. To open yourself to feedback, you must be willing to listen to and accept constructive feedback or even criticism. 

That can be hard!

But there is no way around it if you want to progress to the highest levels of the SAL Hierarchy.

Simply stated, no one person will ever be smarter or wiser than all of the People. No matter how innately self-aware your or I may be, we all have blind spots. Moreover, all of us are also stuck inside our own head and body. As such, we simply cannot see and hear everything that others can see and hear. Therefore, we can always benefit from obtaining feedback from others.  

My Story

During my freshman year of college, I experienced a heartbreaking romantic rejection.

JJ during his college years
Delicate Arch in southeastern Utah
Circa 2001

This rejection was not from a woman I had been seriously dating for months, but from one with whom I only took out on a few casual dates. Ours was not an exclusive relationship. We never even held hands or kissed. 

Despite the relatively shallow nature of our relationship, this rejection was extremely painful and traumatic for me. It interrupted my life's emotional balance so severely that I decided to enter extended psychotherapy for the first time in my life. 

In hindsight, this "rejection" was most likely the result of personality incompatibilities and the absence of physical chemistry on the part of the woman. Nevertheless, for better or for worse, I always assumed that all romantic rejections were at least partially—if not mostly—my fault.

This partially skewed perception of reality wreaked havoc with my thoughts, emotions, and inner security. 

Nevertheless, the situation had a silver lining.  

As bad as it hurt to think that this failed relationship signaled a personal failure on my part, I deeply desired to know how my Existential Standing at the time—as well as my approach to the relationship—might have contributed to my failure.

In other words, I was prepared to authentically engage self-observation, self-examination, and obtain feedback from others in an effort to dissect the situation and then make necessary adjustments to grow personally and avoid similar pain and trauma in the future.   

At this point in my life, it was clear to me that I had some glaring SAL deficiencies. Moreover, my mental hygiene was also suffering—a result of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) and the accompanying retardation of my social development during my teenage years. 

As painful a realization as this was, I knew that if I was ever going to enjoy a healthy romantic relationship with a woman, I needed to address the underlying causes of my faults. Pathological as my disappointment was, I knew it would be wrong for me to blame the girl for rejecting me.

So, I decided to take a careful look deep down inside myself (self-observation) to see where I might have gone wrong (self-examination). I further engaged psychotherapy and the advice and counsel or others (feedback) to help me develop a more successful game plan for the future.   

It was perhaps a bit naïve, unfair, and myopic to assume that this rejection was all—or even mostly—my fault. Again, it may have largely been a result of natural lack of physical attraction or personality compatibility on the woman's part—and there's only so much a guy can do to overcome those variables. 

Nevertheless, I came to realize over time the inherent power in searching deeply within myself for my own problems and weaknesses—as well as the solutions to them. 

This period of my life marked the beginning of my journey toward mental, emotional, and social health—the kind of health that would be required for me to eventually achieve success in romance and other areas of my life and career. 

Anthony Robbins once wrote that when "people succeed, they tend to party; [but] when they fail, they tend to ponder, and they begin to make new distinctions that will enhance the quality of their lives." (4)

"When people succeed they tend to party; when they fail, they tend to ponder."

—Tony Robbins 

Robbins is right, and that is precisely why failure can be such a tremendous blessing in disguise. When we sincerely ponder (self-observation and self-examination) and seek out guidance from wiser, more experienced persons (feedback), we gain self-awareness that can help us "to make new distinctions that will enhance the quality of [our] lives." (5)

Theoretically speaking, the wisest course to take through life is always to learn from the mistakes of others. But practically speaking, there are some lessons you can learn only through personal experience. These times can serve as golden opportunities to ponder, increase self-awareness, and grow. 

These lessons hurt, yes!

Sometimes badly.

But pain can be our ally if it produces the necessary motivation to change, improve, and ultimately succeed. 

There is a famous quote that goes like this: If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. I like this quote, but acknowledge that it skips the vital step of increasing self-awareness and appropriately altering your game plan before you try again.

It does no good to try again if your plan is flawed to begin with. As previously mentioned, "Insanity is doing the same things over and over again while expecting a different result." (6)

"Insanity is doing the same things over and over again while expecting a different result."

—Albert Einstein 

At Freedom Focused, we adjust the proverbial "Try Again" quote in deference to the wisdom found in the "Insanity Quote" to formulate a SAL Mantra as follows: 

SAL Mantra

If at first you don't succeed, figure out why, make a new game plan, and then try again.

Despite the devastation I felt over being rejected romantically, I knew if I wanted to someday succeed in romance, I needed to work on my own insecurities, lack of self-awareness, social immaturities, and troubled mental and emotional states. 

Opting to take complete personal responsibility for my failure, I went to work—heeding along the way the sage advice of M. Scott Peck, who wrote:

"We cannot solve life's problems except by solving them. This statement may seem idiotically tautological and self-evident, yet it is seemingly beyond the comprehension of much of the human race. ... We cannot solve a problem by saying 'it's not my problem.' We cannot solve a problem by hoping that someone else will solve it for us. I can solve a problem only when I say, 'This is my problem and it's up to me to solve it.' But many, so many, seek to avoid the pain of their problems by saying to themselves: 'This problem was caused by other people, or by social circumstances beyond my control, and therefore it is up to other people or society to solve this problem for me. It is not really my personal problem.'" (7) 

The first step to improving my mental hygiene was admitting that my mental hygiene needed work. My mental, emotional, and social problems—and the pain and failure they caused—were real and intense. But the responsibility for these problems were mine and mine alone; there was no use in blaming my circumstances on anyone else. 

My OCD was my problem, and it was my responsibility to confront it head on. 

In addition to entering regular psychotherapy and taking medication, I also accepted Og Mandino's 45-week self-help success challenge as outlined in his book, The Greatest Secret in the World. (8) I dedicated myself to fulfilling this program with a religiosity borne of my quest to improve my circumstances and circumvent unnecessary suffering and failure in the future. 

In light of my full-time class schedule, part-time work, participation in the school play, family time, and a fledgling social and dating life, I knew completing this challenge—which required time and attention three (3) times a day, five (5) days a week for 45 straight weeks—would take tremendous discipline, focus, determination, and stickie-ta-tudy. (9)

This made my successful completion of the challenge very satisfying, and my eventual success in romance very satisfying. 

This unique and extended self-action research project, in conjunction with my ongoing commitment to psychotherapy, pharmacotherapy, self-help, and spirituality laid a firm foundation for bringing about significant growth and improvements to my mental, emotional, and social life. (10)

And it all began with Self-Awareness!

SAL Master Challenge

EXERCISE  #8

Self-action leaders are SELF-AWARE

List three things, people, situations, or circumstances that currently annoy, frighten, or intimidate you.

What can you begin doing today to change internally in order to begin altering your outer reality?

REMEMBER: The only things you can truly control in your life are your own thoughts, speech, actions, attitudes, and beliefs; therein lies your power to change both your internal and external realities.  

I have completed the SAL Master Challenge, EXERCISE #8

Your initials:__________         AP initials:__________

In Your Journal

• In what ways have you already engaged in self-observation, self-examination, and obtaining feedback in your life and/or career?

• What could you do to improve your own self-observation, self-examination, and obtainment of feedback in your life and/or career?  

• Make a list of your strengths and weaknesses. Do not look at or answer any additional questions on this list until you have completed these two lists. When you are finished, come back and answer the rest of the questions in your journal. 

.............................................................................................

• Which list was easier to make? 

• Which list was longer? 

• How honest and complete were you in making these two lists?

• Were you more honest and complete in listing your strengths or weaknesses?

• What emotions did you experience while making your list of strengths?

• What emotions did you experience while making your list of weaknesses?

• What weaknesses can you realistically work on/through on your own?

• What weaknesses will you realistically need the help of others to successfully work on/through?

• What is one action you could take TODAY that would assist you in further refining or polishing one of your strengths?

• What is one action you could take TODAY that would move you forward in the direction of working positively and productively on one of your weaknesses?

 

—Dr. JJ

Wednesday, February 12, 2025

Palm Beach Gardens, Florida, USA

Author's Note: This is the 433rd Blog Post Published by Freedom Focused LLC since November 2013 and the 239th consecutive weekly blog published since August 31, 2020.   

Click HERE for a compete listing of the other 432 FF Blog Articles 

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Click HERE for a complete listing of Freedom Focused SAL POEMS   

Click HERE to access the FULL TEXT of Dr. JJ's Psalms of Life: A Poetry Collection

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Click HERE for a complete listing of Current Events, Cultural, Philosophical, & Miscellaneous Articles

Click HERE for a complete listing of Dr. JJ's Autobiographical Articles

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Chapter 7 Notes

1.  Neck, C. P., & Manz, C. C. (2010). Mastering Self-Leadership: Empowering Yourself for Personal Excellence (Fifth Edition). Upper Saddle River, NJ: Prentice Hall. Pages 17-19.

2.  Ibid. Pages 17-18.

3.  Ibid. Page 19.

4.  Robbins, A. (1991). Awaken the Giant Within: How to Take Immediate Control of Your Mental, Emotional, Physical, and Financial Destiny. New York, NY: Free Press. Page 43.

5. Ibid. 

6.  The origin of this business-cultural “definition of insanity” is unclear, although it is frequently misattributed to Albert Einstein.

7.  Peck, M. S. (1978). The Road Less Traveled: A New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values and Spiritual Growth. New York, NY: Touchstone. Pages 32-33.

8.  Mandino, O. (1978). The Greatest Secret in the World. New York, NY: Bantam Books. Page 2.

9. "Stickie-ta-tudy" is a term coined by Jens Nielson (1821-1906), a 19th century Latter-Day Saint pioneer, who invented the term to describe the ability to "Stick" to a task until it is accomplished or completed. Nielson's verbatim quote reads: "We must go on ... If we have plenty of stickie-ta-tudy we cannot fail." See URL: https://www.hirf.org/NielsonJens.html for more information.  

10.  Jensen, J.R. (2013). Self-Action Leadership: An Autoethnographic Analysis of Self-Leadership through Action Research in Support of a Pedagogy of Personal Leadership. Volume 3. UMI Number: 3592738. Pages 641-656. (Dr. JJ's Doctoral Dissertation).

HUMILITY precedes Existential Growth

 

Chapter 25

HUMILITY precedes Existential Growth 

The penultimate Law in the SAL Theory states: Humility before Universal Laws is a prerequisite to lasting Existential Growth.  

Law 12

Humility before Universal Laws is a prerequisite to lasting Existential Growth.

Highly developed and refined self-action leaders have capacities that relatively few leaders authentically possess.

For example:

They can be tough without being condescending. 

        They can be strict without being rude. 

                And they can be confident without being conceited. 

Such persons understand what relatively few people ever fully internalize: that humility is a vital prerequisite to growth, progress, strength, and everything else that is meaningful and lasts.  

It's possible to have short-term success while simultaneously disregarding, or even flouting Universal Laws. In fact, evil masters of the SAL lowerarchy—like Adolf Hitler—often enjoy extraordinary successes for extended periods of time before natural consequences bring about their ultimate ruin. 

Though some evil persons may be very smart and talented, they are never humble. 

Rather than bowing before Universal Laws, they foolishly try to get the Laws to bend to them; and in the long-run, it never works. 

Sir Isaac Newton
1643-1727

Self-action leaders, on the other hand, always prove more intelligent than their evil counterparts, in-part because they are humble. 

Humility breeds a practical accession of the scientific reality that for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction (Newton's Third Law of Motion)—even if the reaction is (consequences are) are delayed.

And consequences in life often are delayed, sometimes for long periods of time. 

Humble self-action leaders recognize the great truth that long-term consequences come home to roost for everyone, eventually.

Why?

Because Universal Laws apply to everyone.

        They are no respecter of persons.

And they ultimately control and govern absolutely.  

Self-action leaders understand the penetrating reality and truth that Universal Laws always collect payment eventually—and that payment will be multiplied by compound interest over time in the form of consequences that correspond directly to the choices we make. 

These consequences can be devilishly devastating on the one hand, or unspeakably beautiful on the other. 

It all depends upon our choices.

As such, it pays—big time—in the long-run to be humble before, and obedient to, Universal Laws and the True Principles they illuminate.  

What exactly is HUMILITY?

        And what exactly does it mean to be humble?

Boiled down to its fundamental core and distilled down to its purest essence, authentic humility is a natural outgrowth of pure intelligence supported by absolute honesty and complete integrity.

When you truly understand the way things really are, it becomes clear and obvious—a genuine no-brainer—that you should respect and adhere to True Principles rooted in Universal Laws.

After all, the consequences of failing to do so will never favor you in the long-run.

With a clear comprehension of the cornucopia of negative long-term consequences that naturally flow from disregarding Universal Laws, it is clearly foolish to knowingly and willingly choose the lasting pain that inevitably follows existential recalcitrance. Thus, the short-term "smarts" of evil are always unmasked eventually to reveal its colossal folly in the end. 

Authentic humility is measured by your willingness to seek after two basic things. 

FIRST, you must seek out and embrace reality—the TRUTH—about yourself and others. This is a self-action leader's quest for self-awareness. 

SECOND, you must respond—take ACTION—according to and in harmony with that truth. This is a self-action leader's quest for integrity. 

To sum up, honesty, integrity, and self-awareness are hallmarks of and constitute the core components of HUMILITY. These three attributes of character contribute to form the basic qualities of teachability and coachability—two vital characteristics of authentic humility that are absolutely essential to effectively exercising SAL in pursuit of Existential Growth.  

Charles H. Spurgeon
1834-1892

The famous nineteenth century Christian preacher, Charles H. Spurgeon, once succinctly surmised that: humility is to make a right estimate of oneself. 

"Humility is to make a right estimate of oneself."

—Charles H. Spurgeon

While certainly not the only definition of humility, we at Freedom Focused heartily agree that this is a useful and worthy definition. 

I personally really like this definition because it reminds me that humility is more than just recognizing and acknowledging my follies and shortcomings. It is also about recognizing, acknowledging, and then fully utilizing my strengths, talents, and capacities.

This equilibrium is important because there is nothing humble about saying you are bad at something when you are, in fact, quite good at it.  

Authentic humility should never be confused with exaggerated displays of self-deprecation. In fact, such ironic displays of pseudo humility are usually perpetrated by a prideful desire to appear humble to others.

There is nothing humble about that!    

Authentic humility is seeing things as they really are and then acting appropriately and wisely in complete deference to facts and reality. 

At times, humility will require YOU to acknowledge what you lack and then submit to truths, powers, and people above and beyond yourself. 

Real Wisdom is best
personified by...
HUMILITY!

At other times, however, humility will require YOU to recognize your assets and then courageously and shamelessly utilize your strengths and talents for the benefit of yourself and the instruction and mentoring of others. 

WISDOM is knowing the difference between the two and being able to generate the appropriate response based flexibly and fluidly on each and every singular situation in your life.  

In the end, humility is simply a process of seeing, recognizing, and acknowledging the complete and unvarnished TRUTH about everyone and everything—things as they were, are, and will be—and then acting in perfect deference thereto. 

It is that simple in theory.

        And it is that difficult in practice. 

In Your Journal

• Why do you think humility is such a vital prerequisite to Existential Growth?

• What do you think a KEY is to developing humility?

• Why do you think it's so difficult for people to develop humility?

• In what areas of your life are you already practicing humility?

• In what areas of your life might you benefit from being more humble? 

—Dr. JJ

Wednesday, November 27, 2024

Palm Beach Gardens, Florida, USA

Author's Note: This is the 418th Blog Post Published by Freedom Focused LLC since November 2013 and the 227th consecutive weekly blog published since August 31, 2020.   

Click HERE for a compete listing of the other 417 FF Blog Articles 

Click HERE for a complete listing of Freedom Focused SAL QUOTES  

Click HERE for a complete listing of Freedom Focused SAL POEMS   

Click HERE to access the FULL TEXT of Dr. JJ's Psalms of Life: A Poetry Collection

Click HERE for a complete listing of Self-Action Leadership Articles

Click HERE for a complete listing of Fitness, Heath, & Wellness Articles

Click HERE for a complete listing of Biographical & Historical Articles

Click HERE for a complete listing of Current Events, Cultural, Philosophical, & Miscellaneous Articles

Click HERE for a complete listing of Dr. JJ's Autobiographical Articles

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Chapter 25 Notes

Life Leadership Variables

 

Chapter 7

Life Leadership Variables 

Have you ever faced a debilitating challenge only to hear someone say: "You just need to have a better attitude, pull yourself up by your bootstraps, and make it happen!" 

Truth be told, there are times when this approach is appropriate, relevant, and needed. After all, SAL exists to inspire individuals to take personal responsibility for everything in their lives, and the reality is that there are many occasions throughout life when "bootstrapping" may be your only viable option. At such times, your ATTITUDE may indeed make or break the situation.   

On other occasions, however, this same approach could potentially be ignorant, misguided, and perhaps even insulting. Oversimplifying human problems can be problematic—just as overcomplicating, or ignoring them altogether, can likewise be troublesome. 

Self-Action Leadership does not translate into human omniscience or omnipotence, nor does it exist to suggest that solving complex problems is possible by merely "changing your attitude," "pumping yourself up," or "working harder." 

Other variables—both internal and external—exist to produce a variety of human difficulties and problems as well as opportunities and potential. It is important that these additional variables are taken into account as part of our SAL problem-solving calculus.  

At Freedom Focused, we have identified 17 Life Leadership Variables that produce limitations and/or benefits to your potential as a self-action leader. Life Leadership Variables are defined as: variables over which we have varying degrees of control and influence that influence the results we get in our lives.

LIFE  LEADERSHIP  VARIABLES

Variables of reality over which we have varying degrees of control

and/or influence that, in-turn, influence the results we get in our lives.

Life Leadership Variables

1. Forces of Nature
2. Congenital Physical Variables
3. Congenital Family Environment
4. Congenital Social Environment
5. Congenital Intelligence & Talent
6. Initial Opportunities for Education
7. Good and Bad Luck
8. Genetic and Mimetic Inclinations
9. Choices of Others
10. Time
11. Structural Inequality
12. Geopolitics and Macroeconomics
13. Suprarational Intervention  (aka SERENDIPITY)
14. Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs
15. Desire
16. Developed Intelligence & Talent
17. Will Power

Before diving headlong into a discussion of these 17 Life Leadership Variables, it is crucial that we make one thing crystal clear. The purpose of introducing these 17 variables into our discussion of SAL is not to give you a pocketful of excuses for why you can't achieve, grow, and earn freedom in your life. 

The purpose is merely to keep you grounded in the way things really are (reality) in this imperfect and often unfair world. Exploring these variables as they personally relate to YOU will enable and empower you along your journey to SELF-KNOWLEDGE. This is a good thing because self-knowledge—and the self-awareness derived therefrom—lies at the very basis of SAL.

More than two millennia ago, that great Greek philosopher—Socrates—famously encouraged and invited mankind to join him along the pathways of self-knowledge by uttering two simple words, as follows: Know Thyself. His terse injunction—so richly adorned with wisdom—is as important today as it was in 399 B.C.  

"Know Thyself."

—Socrates

While the SAL Philosophy openly and liberally espouses hope and optimism in even the direst of situations and circumstances, its dual aim is to keep your eyes wide open to difficult and painful facts about real life. The goal of this balanced approach is to avoid both pessimism and unbridled optimism in favor of optimistic REALISM. 

What do I mean when I say: "unbridled optimism?" 

        The following example by Tony Robbins helps to illustrate the definition of this term.  

Robbins once remarked that it does no good to go out into your garden and proclaim: "There are no weeds, there are no weeds, there are no weeds!" Such is the error of unbridled optimism. Instead, he encourages us to identify the weeds and then take action to remove them, after which we can realistically report any progress our garden has made through our caring and optimistic planning and efforts.     

In addressing the subject of Life Leadership variables, we must begin by acknowledging and recognizing that every human being is extraordinarily unique. Each one of us possesses a singular combination of genetic and mimetic variables that is unlike any other person. 

Just think of that!

Among the tens of billions of people who have lived throughout recorded history, YOU are truly one-of-a-kind. The life experiences of every human being are uniquely impacted by one's own singular blend of these 17 Life Leadership variables, otherwise known as a person's benefits and limitations formula, or one's SAL Variables Quotient.

SAL VARIABLES' QUOTIENT

A person's unique blend of genetic and mimetic benefits and limitations.

In explicating these 17 variables, it's crucial to remember that so-called "limitations" and "benefits" should be interpreted primarily as potential limitations and potential benefits. Just because a person is born (or otherwise placed) into a circumstantial or situational limitation or benefit does not mean it will always exist. You've undoubtedly met someone who has, over time, either transcended a limitation—or squandered a benefit—with which they were born or otherwise situated. 

So again, we introduce these variables not to provide a list of excuses for why you can't achieve or obtain. We introduce them simply to further enable and empower us to see things as they really are and thereby set goals and visions within a framework of reality as opposed to unbridled optimism, which is also known as "wishful thinking."   

With this introduction in mind, let's now define and dig a little deeper into the 17 Life Leadership variables by providing a definition for each variable in conjunction with examples of its accompanying limitations and benefits.

1).  Forces of Nature

Definition:  Natural forces that govern the physical world and universe. 

Limitations:  Extremities of temperature and weather and other naturally occurring incidents that cause damage, difficulties, and disasters.  

Benefits:  Mild, pleasant weather and ideal temperatures, and a lack of natural disasters. 

Note on Natural Laws: Laws of physics, chemistry, and biology are not benefits or limitations in and of themselves; however, our understanding of and capability to harness and direct those forces can, in-turn become limitations or benefits. For example: the law of gravity is sometimes perceived as a limitation (i.e. we are stuck on the ground). But, if we understand the laws of levitation and/or flight and work with the law, it can become a benefit (i.e. we can now bungee jump, fly, skydive, etc.).    

2).  Congenital Physical Variables

Definition:  Your atomic, biological, chemical, genetic, and physiological makeup at birth.

Limitations:  Congenital disabilities, disorders, and illnesses; disadvantages of height, weight, or physical appearance; lack of athletic abilities and other physical talents, etc. 

Benefits:  Congenital health and well-being; endowments of height, weight, physical appearance; athletic ability and other physical talents, etc.

Note: These stated limitations and benefits are generic examples and assume said states lead to a pre-supposed outcome. However, depending on a given situation, circumstance, attitude, outlook, or perception, such assumptions could, in fact, be reversed. Suffice it to say, a limitation and/or a benefit is often interpreted subjectively based on "the eye of the beholder."  

3).  Congenital Familial Environment

Definition:  Your family circumstances at birth. 

Limitations:  Poverty, abuse, neglect, malnutrition, single-parent families, absent or uncaring parents, etc.  

Benefits:  Love, support, safety, security, encouragement, moral guidance, etc.  

4).  Congenital Social Environment

Definition:  The familial and social environment into which you are born.

Limitations:  Growing up amongst people who predominantly exemplify negative and destructive actions and habits, such as: cowardice, dishonesty, disloyalty, disrespect, erratic behavior, ill-temperedness, impulsivity, unfaithfulness, emotional immaturity, myopia, etc.

Benefits:  Growing up amongst people who predominantly exemplify positive and constructive actions and habits, such as: courage, honesty, loyalty, respect, stability, kindness, self-discipline, fidelity, emotional intelligence, vision, etc.   

5).  Congenital Intelligence & Talent

Definition:  The intellectual and talent potential at-brith based upon your genetic makeup alone.

Limitations:  Some people are born with a less-endowed IQ and TQ (talent quotient) than others.

Benefits:  Some people are born with a more-endowed IQ and TQ than others.  

6).  Initial Opportunities for Education

Definition:  The opportunities for education provided to you by your parents and/or guardians/caregivers prior to entering adulthood.  

Limitations:  Lack of formal educational opportunities and/or a lack or absence of parental encouragement, enthusiasm, mentoring, modeling, and support.

Benefits:  Opportunities to receive high quality public or private schooling, tutoring, mentoring, coaching; the chance to participate in extracurricular activities; strong educational reinforcement and support at home; and well-educated parents, caregivers, and role models.  

7).  Good and Bad Luck

Definition:  Seemingly arbitrary and capricious events that occur beyond the influence of your own thoughts, speech, and actions.  

Limitations:  Bad luck—everyone experiences it to some degree in life.

Benefits:  Good luck—everyone experiences it in some degree life.

Note: It has often been said that you "make your own luck" over time. Put another way: "The harder you work, the luckier you get" is another common refrain of an optimistic outlook. At Freedom Focused, we very much support the sentiment shared in these statements. However, objectively speaking, the "luck" that we as self-action leaders create over time isn't really "luck" as we define it above because that kind of "luck" is influenced by our thoughts, speech, and actions.   

8).  Genetic and Mimetic Inclinations

Definition:  Inborn and learned inclinations from your parents and/or caregivers/guardians. 

Limitations:  Addictions, bad habits, and other negative habits and practices that are either innate or learned, such as: cowardice, dishonesty, disloyalty, disrespect, erratic behavior, ill-temperedness, impulsivity, unfaithfulness, emotional immaturity, myopia, etc.

Benefits:  Positive habits and inclinations that are either innate or learned, such as: courage, honesty, loyalty, respect, stability, kindness, self-discipline, fidelity, emotional intelligence, vision, etc.   

Note: A better—and more accurate—way of framing genetic and mimetic "limitations" would be to employ the word "challenges." This is because human beings possess the capacity to transcend many genetic and mimetic inclinations through SAL and SERENDIPITY over time, thereby turning limitations into benefits.  

9).  Choices of Others

Definition:  The thoughts, speech, and actions of those around you who impact or influence your life.

Limitations:  Abuse, abandonment, deception, insensitivity, irresponsibility, profligacy, thoughtlessness, etc.  

Benefits:  Courtesy, compassion, fidelity, integrity, sensitivity, responsibility, wisdom, thoughtfulness, etc.   

10).  Time

Definition:  The passage of one moment to the next throughout the duration of your physical existence in this world. 

Limitations:  Its finite quality.

Benefits:  Its existence. 

11).  Structural Inequality

Definition:  Having the "cards" stacked unfairly against you because of certain immutable characteristics such as: ethnicity, race, religion, political affiliation, sexual orientation, etc.  

Limitations:  Stifled opportunities due to your possession of certain immutable and other characteristics.  

Benefits:  Expanded opportunities due to your possession of certain immutable and other characteristics.

12).  Geopolitics & Macroeconomics

Definition:  The broad and complex interplay of economics and politics throughout one's community, region, state, nation, and world.  

Limitations:  Residence and/or citizenship in areas marked by corruption, poverty, scarcity, war, etc.

Benefits:  Residence and/or citizenship in areas marked by integrity, affluence, abundance, peace, etc.  

13).  Suprarational Intervention  (aka SERENDIPITY)

Definition:  Serendipitous and rationally inexplicable events that provide you with benefits, blessings, favors, gifts, and opportunities.

Limitations:  A scarcity of Serendipitous aid.

Benefits:  An abundance of Serendipitous aid.

Note: At Freedom Focused, we believe that Serendipity blesses us according to our needs and wants and is conditioned upon our willingness to care for others and faithfully attend to our Existential Duties. Given this paradigm, a lack of Serendipitous Aid may result from one's own failure to care for others and attend to their duties. 

14).  Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs (1)

Definition:  A hierarchy of needs' paradigm set forth by Abraham Maslow in a groundbreaking academic paper published in 1943. It posits that primary needs such as safety, shelter, food, clothing, acceptance, and love must be met before one can reasonably aspire to and meet higher (secondary) needs such as self-esteem, advanced cognitive development, and self-actualization.

Limitations:  If you are born or otherwise face unmet primary (lower) needs, you will have greater difficulty aspiring towards and realizing secondary (higher) needs.

Benefits:  If you are born with or otherwise have your primary needs fulfilled, you will have greater success aspiring towards and realizing secondary needs.  

15).  Desire

Definition:  An inner yearning to achieve, obtain, or become something.

Limitations:  Possessing a scarcity of desire to work hard, sacrifice, and otherwise pay the price required to earn Existential Growth, Balance, and personal freedom.

Benefits:  Possessing an abundance of desire to work hard, sacrifice, and otherwise pay the price required to earn Existential Growth, Balance, and personal freedom. 

Note: Of all the topics addressed in this comprehensive Life Leadership textbook, human desire is perhaps the most enigmatic. This is because it can be difficult to pinpoint exactly why a given person does or does not desire something. In addition to being the most mysterious subject addressed in this text, it is also the most important, for without it, nothing else goes, succeeds, or works. It is an absolutely indispensable ingredient in everything that we do on the altars of pursuing achievement, contentment, growth, freedom, fulfillment, happiness, success, inner peace, etc.   

Desire is categorized as being a variable over which we have some control or influence, but not all. While you can't control how you feel, you can control what you do about how you feel. As a result, you do have a measure of influence over your desires and feelings by virtue of what you choose to do.  

16).  Developed Intelligence & Talent

Definition:  The intelligence and talent a self-action leader develops through discipline, focus, hard work, consistence, persistence, and determination.  

Limitations:  Theoretically, there is no limit to the potential development of a given person's intellect and talent. Thus, the only real limitation to this variable is your own desire and will to pursue it.

Benefits:  The benefits are potentially endless, and are conditional on one's desire and will to pursue it.

17).  Will Power

Definition:  The inner resolve and determination required to carry out a given act or series of actions.

Limitations:  Some people have weaker wills than others. The reason is sometimes quite mysterious and hearkens back to the enigma of desire.

Benefits:  Some people have stronger wills than others. The reason is likewise mysterious and hearkens back to the enigma of desire.  

As you review this list of 17 Life Leadership variables, you will notice that some limitations and benefits are congenital, meaning a person is born with the limitation or benefit. Others depend on what you do (or don't do) after your life begins. These 17 variables can therefore be divided into three basic categories, as follows: 

Category 1:  Variables you cannot control

• Forces of Nature
• Congenital Physical Variables
• Congenital Familial Environment
• Congenital Social Environment
• Congenital Intelligence and Talent
• Initial Opportunities for Education
• Good and Bad Luck

Category 2:  Variables over which you possess some influence

• Genetic and Mimetic Inclinations
• Choices of Others
• Time
• Structural Inequality
• Geopolitics and Macroeconomics
• Suprarational Intervention  (SERENDIPITY)
• Hierarchy of Needs
• Desire

Category 3:  Variables you can control

• Developed Intelligence and Talents
• Will

As you review this list, you will notice that of these 17 variables, there are only two that you can actually consistently control. At first glance, it might be deflating and disappointing to discover just how much you can't control in your life in this world.

But you should never underestimate the power of your DESIRE and WILL.

        Likewise, you never underestimate the power of variables over which you have little or no control.

While it's true that some bad things happen because YOU act in foolish and irresponsible ways, it's also true that some bad things happen because other people act irresponsibly and foolishly—or because external events occur beyond your control. Moreover, disabilities, abuse, and structural inequality undoubtedly pose great obstacles for many. Such challenges can sometimes seem insurmountable, overwhelming, and disillusioning to the very best of us.

That is the bad news.

The GOOD NEWS is that no matter how bad you may have had it in the past, or how rough things might be in the present, you can always choose to make the best of what you have moving forward forever into the future. Self-action leaders continually strive to do their best with what they have wherever they are.

SAL Mantra

Do your best with what you have wherever you are.

At any moment in your life or career, YOU can decide to create a better life for yourself and your loved ones. You can also work to enhance the opportunities that your children and posterity (and/or the offspring of your friends and loved ones) can enjoy for generations to come.

In many cases, your control over other people and things is either nonexistent or drastically limited. Your control over your own thoughts, speech, and actions, however, provides a perpetual opportunity to achieve, grow, and earn additional balance and freedom in your life. 

As such, your freedom to choose empowers you to dramatically improve your external circumstances over time—if you decide to take advantage of it. In the stirring words of Plutarch and Otto Rank: What you achieve inwardly changes your outer reality.

"What you achieve inwardly changes your outer reality."

—Plutarch and Otto Rank

On the downside, there are many variables in life that you cannot control. On the upside, you can control the most important variable of all—your own will. By focusing on what you can control in your life, you discover over time that you can actually exert a great deal of influence on many other variables.

How you choose to exercise your will—and not the external circumstances in which you presently find yourself—makes the biggest difference in the long-term results you get in your life. Thus, YOUR WILL serves as the primary catalyst that determines what you become in the end. Hence, decisions really do determine destiny.

"Your decisions determine your destiny."

—Common Saying

YOUR WILL to do—or not do—is the greatest power you possess for the simple reason that it's the only thing you can fully control; it's the one force of nature that is entirely at your command. No one else is responsible for it, and no one can take it away from you without your permission. 

You may give it up to someone or something else, but otherwise, it's YOURS—and yours alone—to engage, direct, manage, and lead. The way in which you supervise your own will, will make the biggest single difference in the long-term balance, growth, and results you get in your life. 

What will you choose to do with YOUR will? 

        Your decisions in the matter really will determine your destiny over time.  

Faults vs. Problems

Much earlier in my career, during the 2009-2010 school year, I taught 9th grade English Language Arts in a large, public high school in Houston, Texas. When things would get difficult for us as teachers, and especially when it came to dealing with issues that were not of our own making (e.g. poor parenting, broken homes, negative peer pressure, culturally influenced bad behavior, etc.), administrators had a mantra they would repeat to us that went like this: It may not be your fault, but it is your problem; so, what are you going to do about it?

SAL Mantra

It may not be your fault, but it is your problem; so, what are you going to do about it?

This is one of the best SAL reminders of reality I've ever heard. 

Translation: I did not create all of the problems in my life. But if the problems are in my life, then it's my responsibility to accept, properly address, and where possible, to resolve them. Pointing fingers of blame at other people, events, or things might feel good in the moment, but it never permanently solves real problems. 

This principle of responsibility versus blame applies to YOU, me, and everyone else in the world. All of your problems may not by your fault, but they are YOUR problems; so, what are YOU going to do about them? Because I can promise you that if you wait around for someone else to solve your problem/s for you, then you will usually be waiting around for a very long time.

So...

        What are YOU going to do about the problems in your life?

You can't change who you are, where you started out in life, or what you had (or didn't have) when you began your life in this world. But you always have the liberty to do something about it. As s result, you ultimately possess all the power you need to enormously influence how and where your story will end. 

When the final chapter of your life is written, will your story be one of virtue and victory, or of victimization and vice?

        The choice is YOURS!

As you consider your life and career choices moving forward, we at Freedom Focused invite you to consider and remember the words of Dr. Stephen R. Covey, who wrote: Highly proactive people ... do not blame their circumstances, conditions, or conditioning for their behavior. Their behavior is a product of their own conscious choice, based on values, rather than a product of their conditions, based on feeling ... [A proactive person's] honor is greater than [his or her] moods." (1)

"[Self-action leaders] do not blame their circumstances, conditions, or conditioning

for their behavior. Their behavior is a product of their own conscience choice,

based on values, rather than a product of their conditions, based on feeling.

[A self-action leader's] honor is greater than his or her moods."

—Stephen R. Covey

In Your Journal

Go back through the 17 Life Leadership variables with your own life's ancestry, history, and experiences in mind. What limitations and benefits arise to form your unique SAL Variables' Quotient? After doing so, review your quotient's variables as you ask yourself the following questions:

• Have I over-reported any of my limitations? If so, why?

• Have I under-reported any of my benefits? If so, why?

• What can I do to see things more accurately and objectively in my education, career, and life?

• What can I do to transcend past abuse, disappointments, disillusionments, frustrations, ignorings, rejections, etc., in a way that could potentially turn my limitations into benefits?

********************

This concludes BOOK the THIRD, the Self-Action Leadership PHILOSOPHY, which is defined as: Principles, practices, and premises that promote taking complete personal responsibility for everything in your life that you can either control or influence. 

With its philosophical foundation fully laid, it's now time to begin constructing the superstructure of SAL by introducing its two core frameworks: The SAL Theory and the SAL Model, which comprise BOOKS the FOURTH and FIFTH, respectively. 

—Dr. JJ

Tuesday, May 14, 2024

Palm Beach Gardens, Florida, USA

Author's Note: This is the 388th Blog Post Published by Freedom Focused LLC since November 2013 and the 199th consecutive weekly blog published since August 31, 2020.   

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Chapter 7 Notes:

1.  Maslow, A.H. (1943). "A Theory of Human Motivation." Psychological Review. Volume 50. Issue 4. Pages 370-396.*

* Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs refers to a model of human progress developed in the early 1940s by the American psychologist, Abraham Maslow (1908-1970). Maslow’s famous theory states that all human beings are motivated by a hierarchy of needs, and that lower needs must be met before higher needs can motivate. His hierarchy is often presented visually as a triangle model with basic human needs forming the base and higher human needs forming the top. His five basic needs include Survival needs (Level One), Safety needs (Level Two), Love needs (Level Three), Esteem needs (Level Four), and Self-Actualization needs (Level Five).

2.  Covey, S. R. (1989). The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change. New York, NY: Fireside. Pages 71 and 92.

3.  I first heard a similar statement to this by my friend, Dr. Nathaniel J. Williams. Dr. Williams' own SAL story is featured in BOOK the SIXTH, Chapter 6.